I was looking through my December 06 issue of Self, when I came upon an article about Jennifer Aniston and how yoga helped her through a trying time after her marriage ended. (I love that Self doesn't exploit itself by splashing her image all over the cover, but instead highlighted cover girl Cameron Diaz, and JA was tucked somewhere near the back of the mag.) Anyhow, it was a complimentary article but this is what gets me rattled about the way she's been approaching her post-Brad days. (He was called He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named in the article. Is that really necessary?!? Grow up already!)
Wah, my life sucks 'cause my ex has a genetically perfect baby with that ho. Wah, I'm still single 'cause Vince-who-I-never-dated-so-we-never-broke-up couldn't commit. Wah, I'm skinny and rich. Wah, my life is boring.
Can she get over herself and do something about it? Why does she need a man to be happy? Why a baby? Why can't she do something that's not about her her her? All I ever hear about her is how she lays low w/ close friends, does yoga, film a few movies, and that's essentially her life. No wonder she can't get over Brad. She has so much wealth and free time that she doesn't have anything better to do than to hold a grudge. Travel! See the world! Take up a new hobby! Quit smoking! Maybe eat something! Then she won't be so grumpy. Does this woman lack ambition or passion or what? Does she do anything other than what I've listed above? She doesn't even experience retail therapy. She looks the same in every outfit/make-up/hair. She's stuck in her hum-drum routines. If I were Brad, I'd go for Angelina, too. Why? Look at the stats.
Angelina is talented (she's won 1 Oscar and 2 Golden Globes), beautiful, adventurous (she flies her own plane and goes on treks with Brad on her own motorcycle), nurturing (mother of 3, 2 of whom are adopted), caring (UN Goodwill Ambassador), and oh yeah, she's beautiful. Jen, what have you done? What have you TRIED to do? Does anyone care?!? Do you need a man to dignify yourself?
Look, everyone goes through shit. There are people starving out there, wars are constantly being fought, and the world is going to end in a few years 'cause of global warming. There are SO many important things we should be focused on. Having love in our lives is VERY important, I wouldn't argue with that. But she's been mourning just too long. Brad is hot, but he's also getting to be an old fart, so she should aim for a new, younger hottie, like Milo or Tom. So you lost your All-American perfect marriage. There are worse things in life. Like having no teeth. Or psoriasis.
If she's not careful, her legacy is going to end up being "the girl who was on Friends" and "the girl who got dumped by Brad." It's come to the point where when there's news about her, I KNOW it's a slow news day, 'cause she certainly hasn't done anything new that was newsworthy. I loved her when she was Rachel Green, but now I just feel sorry for her. Stop drowning yourself in your own narcissism, wake up, and MOVE ON!
More photos of Jen faking happiness for the cameras.
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